Fear And Fire

Last week I went downstairs to put wood in the fire, just like I always do on a cold blustery evening before bed. My 3 year old trailed behind me hopping down each step on the stairs eager to help pick out wood to put in the fire. Being the end of February our wood pile was dwindling with more of those odd shaped and large pieces left to chose from. I grabbed an armful of pieces and began to pile them in the fire box, the last log was just a little too big to fit in the fire box and I couldn’t shut the door. As I sat there on the designated log in front of the furnace scratching my head thinking what I should do next I noticed a large puff of smoke behind my three year olds head as he sat on the stairs. I saw something glowing behind him in the chimney, Could it really be? Was there a fire in the chimney? 

I walked around the back of the furnace and saw the metal heating pipe was glowing orange and there was a fire in the pipe. My heart started beating fast, and fear filled my body. My adrenaline started pumping and I started working fast to solve the problem. I tried to slam my back against the snow covered basement bilco doors to try to open them to release the suffocating amount of smoke that filled the basement, but  I couldn’t. I knew I had to shut the door to the firebox and quickly if I was going to slow down this chimney fire. I reached my hand in to grab the ignited log, luckily there was one little tip (the part that didn’t fit in) that hadn’t ignited yet. I pulled it out of the fire and chucked it in a 5 gallon bucket that was close by and quickly sprinted up the stairs through the kitchen and out the door and chucked it in the snow. 

Fear is crucial. 

Fear is designed to get our adrenaline pumping, help us to make decisions quickly and be ready to fight whatever danger is in our path. 

My 3 year old was there with me, through it all. It was just me and him. While I was running around scared trying to figure out what to do he looks at me with his little bottom lip quivering and says “mommy, my body is telling me that I am scared.” With his sweet little trembling voice he puts his hand over his heart and while thumping his chest says, “my heart doing ‘dis”. He was experiencing the same fear as I was because we were both seeing danger in our midst. 

Fear is essential in our lives it keeps us safe. But there are times that we are full of fear and there is not a fire to put out or a lion to fight. 

We have fear of failure. 

Fear of loss. 

Fear of not being perfect. 

Fear of not being included. 

Fear of rejection. 

These are the fears that although very real to us, our not crucial to our physichal safety. 

These types of fears keep us paralyzed. They keep us safe but in a dangerous way. They keep us in our mental “cave” where we can’t get hurt. 

We can’t be rejected if we never leave the cave. 

We can’t lose if we never gain. 

We can’t fail if we never try. 

Therefore we must know the difference. When is the fear I’m experiencing keeping me and my family safe from physichal dangers, and when is the fear I’m experiencing paralyzing me from living a full life? 

Know the difference, remind your brain all the time. 

(**Also for your own information our home is safe and secure. All things were professionally cared for, and owner operator (aka me) learned error from experience!)