Blame & Excuses
You want to know one of my new goals in life. It is to STOP blaming other people for anything. AND to not make excuses for things.
I always like to bring your attention to my first born son. My “test” kid. The one I made A LOOOTTTTTT of mistakes on and am continuing to see this science experiment play out. There is a special place in heaven for this sweet boy. Okay, as I watch him navigate through his life as the oldest brother to two little boys I see him blaming EVERYONE for EVERYTHING.
It is earth shattering for him when he get’s in trouble and the first thing he says is, “It’s not my fault, ______ made me do it.” or “If ______ wasn’t there I wouldn’t have had to do that.”
It’s so easy for me to see blame and excuses in somebody else but ironically I have the same exact arsenal of excuses and go to blame techniques.
Something like this,
“Ugh, if the house was just clean I could relax.”
or
“I’m late because you guys (me addressing my three sons) didn’t do what you were supposed to do.”
or
“I can’t workout because I’ve got too much going on this week.”
And so on and so forth.
As adults we LOVE to blame everybody for everything. The government. Our bosses. Even God himself. We think that any problems we face is because someone else didn’t do what they were supposed to.
Real mature huh? Now now, don’t get too sensitive here. We are all guilty of this. It is one of the beautiful tendencies of an emotional incomplete person. (me!) We rely on others to feel something, and we blame others when we don’t want to feel something.
We make excuses why we can, or cannot do something that we took responsibility for in one capacity or another.
We are emotional children. So that’s why when I see my 8 year old behaving that way, I take GREAT notice. Because I’m so so so guilty of it. It’s just easier to see it in someone else then to see it in myself.
So mark my words, from this day forth I am vowing to not point blame, or make excuses. I will deal with whatever results I create with my behaviors. I want to take responsibility for what I’m feeling and know that I am the sole owner of all of it. When we start to own up to what we feel, and what we create, magic things happen. We don’t play the victim role, we are empowered. Powerful, certain, strong women that own up to their faults and know that they are part of the human experience here on earth. We WILL mess up, we WILL fail, we WILL screw up a kid or two (just kidding), we can step up into our role as women. Those tough parts of being a woman, mother and wife…. all of the ugly, blaring, faults don’t define us. We learn to be okay with them. We learn to learn from them. (How do you like that line) We have a growth mindset and can see that standing behind blame and excuses keeps us stuck in life.
